In order to share Penny's birth story, I feel I need to share my past experience with birth and also a bit of our journey to making the decision to have a home birth.
With my first baby, I did not inform myself very much. I read "What to expect when you're expecting" and followed my pregnancy tracker online, but I didn't do much more than that. I didn't read up on all ways of giving birth and had never heard anything about delayed cord clamping, waiting to bathe the baby, etc. I also didn't really worry about what I consumed while pregnant. When the time came to have my sweet baby boy, I was induced at 41 weeks at which I had an epidural and an episiotomy. The labor was 12 hours long but I didn't mind because I had an epidural and no pain - or feeling for that matter. My sweet Jude was 9lbs 1 oz. I was so happy to have my baby on my chest and in my arms but the days after were not easy. I discovered that I had ripped to a 5 degree and because of that, I could hardly walk.
Fast forward two and a half years later and I was about to have baby boy #2. I had switched to a Dr. I could communicate with better and was so happy to have him deliver our baby! This pregnancy I was more active and watched what I ate more and also informed myself a little more. I knew I did not want an episiotomy and I wanted to wait longer to get the epidural so I could feel contractions and know that pain - in case I ever wanted to go natural. Baby Maxwell decided to flip at 38 weeks so we scheduled a version at almost 39 weeks and found he had flipped back. Because of the flipping scare however, we begged the Dr. to induce me a week before my due date and we had our sweet Maxwell at 8lbs 3oz. The labor with Maxwell was 6 hours long with a less strong epidural - where I could actually feel pressure and direct my pushing. I liked that I felt more involved and like I was actually doing something to get this baby out. Maxwell's birth was much better because I spoke up for the experience I wanted and got it! Afterwards however was rough. I was plagued with post-partum depression and a sick baby. Max had reflux, colic, eczema and had jaundice. I was really struggling with my identity as a mother.. I was not happy and didn't feel like I could handle motherhood or life for that matter.
After my first two birth experiences, I knew I wanted to wait longer to have the next baby, and I wanted to inform myself and do things differently. I also knew I needed to become more mentally healthy. I did some soul searching, some bettering of myself, some major spiritual work took place and I finally felt like my true self again. During this time, we as a family also made a big decision to homeschool. Our eyes were opened to a path meant for our family and the more we learned about schooling and the current state of the school systems, the more we saw everything differently. Suddenly I couldn't see anywhere being as safe as my home. I no longer felt I could leave my best interest up to establishments such as schools and hospitals. Although both homeschooling and home birthing seemed completely impossible and even frightening to me, public school and a hospital birth seemed even more impossible and frightening. Then began my research in natural birth and home birth.
I had quite a few friends that had delivered naturally that I could talk to and it was such a blessing! I asked one of my friends a lot about her home birth specifically. My friend and her husband spoke to Trenton and I about their home birth experience a lot and it got us really excited! It felt really good to have Trenton on board with the idea of going naturally too. When I became pregnant, we prayed about the decision and felt an overwhelming sense of peace. We met with a midwife and were so thrilled to hear how "in-line" her philosophies were with ours.
Cyndi, my midwife became more than a baby doctor, she became a friend, a place for knowledge and reassurance. I felt such a wonderful sense of care from her and like I had so many tools at my finger tips to inform myself. I learned about delayed cord clamping, delayed bathing, natural healing, and more! I felt so empowered during this pregnancy! I felt like I was finally going to give birth the way I wanted to - even though I hadn't realized I wanted this with the other two. And as the end of the pregnancy neared, I only felt more and more confident in my abilities and the experience I was about to have!
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